I lock the door, shut tight, afraid to know
what's lingering outside, maybe monsters
and demons (of love) that yearn to crawl
into my womb, ravage my brain,
infest my heart and break
my spine apart.

Or maybe angels, in summer noon,
spinning in circles, riding on pheonix,
with glitter dresses and leaves
in their long brown hair.

I can stay asleep above rooftops,
over sunny rays and cold
raindrops, with stars
that never rose so high,
and wish to die in your
bright lit eyes.

Long to listen to your heart
speak in melancholy tones in the night,
and your skin shredding some
warm light, under
smog-wreathed trees,
naked and shivering
with affright.

Save me, in this hurricane
that has made its plight,
windows whistle, candles dance,
swimming in haunted
beauty, don't leave me,
I'm already losing this fight.

I don't believe that anybody feels the way I do about you now..

I promise not to be weak anymore.
I promise not to think about it.
I promise not to let it get to me.
I promise not to break down and cry.

If you're living,
then you must
be living
in that song..

haven't you?

I can't believe it's only 11 PM right now! What the fuck! It feels like it's almost close to 2 in the morning or something, maybe because I've been lying on my bed for far too long it seems, and being online since forever..

Lucky me, today I had my good old Fridays ritual after school with the girls after so long! Been waiting for this day too patiently, had yummy good Swedish meatballs (obviously) at Ikea and bumped into Victor, Tash and Jamie later on. The sister joined us for lunch as well. Spotted Lewis and Aiman sitting somewhere far from us halfway eating but hey, it's always not too hard to spot a tall white guy with super blonde hair among a crowd of others consisting of black heads. Hehe. Sister's off for the night tonight at her friend's place so it's peaceful time for me. Savour every bit of it before it is ruined!

Anyway, last night I only slept at 1 in the morning after my good whole episode of Gossip Girl, the very last episode of Season 2! Yes yes yes I know I may be slower than most of you but I don't give a fuck, I loved loved loved every bit of it!

Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass Chuck Bass!!!!!!!!!

Rumours has it that Hilary Dumbo Duff is gonna be featured in the next season of Gossip Girl and I cannot be more disgusted than that. Bitch.

Happy Fridays!

My personal tribute to MJ, it's a short post, I know but bare with me.



My classmate pasted a large poster of Michael Jackson right on the left side of our class board a few days back, and it goes by the quote from The King Of Pop himself, "If you enter this world knowing you are loved and you leave this world knowing the same, then everything that happens in between can be dealt with."

Just beautiful words.
Rest in peace.

I'm holding my heart too tight, afraid that the piercing wind might blow it away somehow, listening to sad slow songs that gets me feeling so nostalgic, and surrounded by silence crumbling in the contents of my brain's blackhole as the seconds turn to minutes, minutes turn to hours, hours turn to days, days turn to weeks, weeks turn to months and months turn to years..

it goes on.

They can never stop following me, constantly taking a hard hold on my ankle, grabbing me down, sliding me through cracked floors like it's all just a fun game, and I - I just want to get away; from everything that's pushing me forcefully into an empty space so sombre, living in regrets and voices that only replay things that I don't wanna fucking hear. I don't wanna stay here. I don't wanna remember.